time

The 2 weeks I was away were difficult.  I am surprised though.  They were not difficult in a way where I felt like I needed to call him and talk to him and tell him I missed him.   They were difficult because I received 2 emails and a few texts from him saying how sorry he was and that he missed me.  I removed his number from my phone and honestly, getting those messages without a name or photo attached to them makes a huge difference.  The knife in my heart didn't turn as hard.  The pain was not there.  I am still unsure what I want.  I got home on Sunday and have been feeling really good.  I don't have that awful feeling in my stomach.  I miss him but it's not an in a painful aching way. 
I feel inspired to make things.  I feel creative and I want to make things.  It helps me.  It makes me feel better.  I am starting to see that I have been forgetting my talents on the back burner.  It's time for this to change.  I have big plans for next year.  I want to have my plate full.  I want to be involved in everything I possibly can.  I want to make a name for myself in my community and grow through this blog. 
I'm not in any hurry to make a decision on the boy stuff.  I can take my time.  I've waited around enough for him and it's my time.  I really believe 2013 is my year to make big things happen.  Let the lists begin!  Thank you for all the support and comments on the blog.  They are appreciated more than you may ever know! 

XOXO